finding your core values - part 1 - her sunday ritual
This is a 2- part ritual series on core values.
This feature ritual is brought to you by Alex StePhen-Fullgraf Certified Life Coach. This week, we will be ‘finding’ our core values, and next, ‘applying’ our core values.
HER SUNDAY RITUAL: CONNECTING TO YOUR CORE VALUES
Have you ever found yourself asking, “What really matters to me? What do I want? What direction do I want to follow?”
All these questions and more can be answered if you are clear on your core values.
What are core values?
They are a part of us.
They are what we stand for.
They provide purpose and direction.
They guide our decision-making.
In effect, they become our guiding compass (which Jayla has written about and discussed before). With a compass, you will not feel lost. The core values are the arrows on the compass that provide you with direction and meaning. When you are clear on your core values, you are better positioned to lead a purposeful life that you have chosen.
Core Values Provide Meaning and Direction
A Stanford research project explored the key differences between lives of happiness and meaningfulness. The researchers surveyed 397 people over a month-long period. At the end, Clifton Parker who analyzed this study, conclusion was that;
“If happiness is about getting what you want, then meaningfulness is about expressing and defining yourself. A life of meaning is more deeply tied to a valued sense of self and one's purpose in the larger context of life and community.”
Many people I have worked with tell me that their life takes on a new meaning and direction with their core values. Your core values really express who you are and what you stand for.
Core Values as a Checklist for Decisions
When you identify what matters to you life become so much simpler because you are acting in accordance with your values all the time. You can use the values as a checklist and ask yourself, is this decision reflective of my core values? Go through the values and check them off. The real benefit is that you have a checklist aka a compass now for life.
As Verne Harnish explains in Scaling Up, that when values permeate the company, leadership can avoid being sucked into day to day operational issues, the rule becomes, “if you think you need to ask me permission for something, just consult the core values!”
The values become that checklist that governs decisions and ethical behaviour.
I’m so excited dive into these questions with Her Collectives at our upcoming mastermind! We will take a deep dive into core values and your unique brand. This will provide the blueprint for your life and business going forward.
YOUR SUNDAY RITUAL: QUESTIONS TO FIND YOUR VALUES
Today’s ritual I will guide you to help you find out your core values, aka, your compass.
Here are some simple questions you can ask yourself to help you find out your core values. Grab a paper and pen and get ready to become a detective! Your job is to look for patterns in your answers.
STEP 1: WRITE DOWN THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS:
What are your top 3 favourite books and or movies and why? (Think about what drew you to the characters or the information? What qualities do they have?)
What are your top 3 favorite songs?(What is it about the lyrics or beat that really resonate with you).
What is something that makes you really angry? *
What were 3 things you loved to do as a kid? Why?
Who do you admire? Why?
STEP 2: LOOK FOR TRENDS IN YOUR ANSWERS
Now look for trends and patterns in the answers. Are there key words that are coming up again and again?
*Ps, for what makes you angry, it is the opposite of the things that make us angry that are usually core values.
You will probably have uncovered several values in the process and feel free to add as many as come to mind.
The values may be obvious and already in your life or they may be things you are drawn to but are not currently exhibiting. You don’t have to have them currently in your life to identify them as core values; however they are things that you desire and are willing to work to create!
STEP 3: NARROW DOWN
Next, let's narrow down to 5-10 values. I would recommend to narrow it down to 5 core values because that way you can remember all of them. Research shows that most adults can only remember 5-9 items in their short term memory.
If you have more than 5 then please start to narrow them into group or themes and ask yourself the following:
Is there one you are drawn to more?
Ask yourself what value is essential to my life?
What am I incapable of living without?
Is this value authentic to me?
STEP 4: ENJOY YOUR VALUES OVER THE NEXT WEEK!
Enjoy your values over the next week and then start to rank them in order of importance.
If you want to take your values to the next level stay tuned for next week!
Her Collectives will be launching a mastermind in January that will be looking at how to use your core values in your business among other amazing topics. This group of curated women supporting women will be co-lead by Jayla and myself. LEARN MORE HERE.
YOUR MANTRA THIS WEEK:
I am open to more <your new core value> in my life.
Share with us your ritual! If you share any of your sunday rituals from any weeks, use hashtag #mysundayritual and tag us (her_collectives). We would love to see how you incorporate it and may share/get prizes ;).
WANT TO CONTRIBUTE?
Her Collectives is all about supporting and inspiring other women's personal or professional path for growth. For this reason, we love to collaborate and feature other like minded women and organizations that can also inspire others.
For this reason, we will be having more 'featured' Sunday Rituals coming up (hint, next week we have a great one for you). If you feel like you have something of value to contribute to the her collectives community, please send me an email with your background and thoughts!